Bad Boys for Dummies
by Jullieanne
Summary: Kagamine Rin is the epitome of pure. Len...is Len. When two worlds collide, sparks fly instantly. Will the two last? Or will other forces break them apart? Rating is subject to change.


**WARNING: ****Rated ****T+. ****NOT ****RECOMMENDED ****FOR ****KIDS.****Very ****little ****cussing ****on ****Rin****'****s ****part, ****but...let****'****s ****just ****say ****Len ****has ****a ****potty ****mouth.****Not ****enough ****to ****make ****a ****pirate ****cringe, ****but ****he ****has ****one ****nonetheless. ****Some ****other...characters ****in ****this ****story ****like ****to ****cuss **_**like **_**a ****pirate. ****Rating ****is ****subject ****to ****change, ****however. **

**Don't tell me to be more "descriptive." Sorry, I'd very much rather go on with the action rather than describing what color Len's or whomever's hair is. **

**I ****apologize ****in ****advance ****for ****any ****typos ****or ****mistakes.****This ****is ****very ****much ****out ****of ****my ****comfort ****zone. ****I ****currently ****have ****no ****beta, ****but ****if ****any ****of ****you ****lovely ****readers ****are ****willing ****to ****do ****so, ****please ****PM ****me.**

**Reviewers can have Len's leather jacket. Psh. I wish. If I had his jacket...**

**Disclaimer: I only own my laptop...but I might as well as not own that either.**

**A/N: So here we are. Chapter one. Read my little devils, read. Wonderful wall of text up here ^**

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><p><strong>Bad <strong>**Boys ****for ****Dummies**

_Step One: Physical Attraction_

To catch a bad boy's attention there first must be physical attraction. Although a lasting romantic relationship cannot stand on physical attraction alone, it is necessary to draw them in. If there is no physical attraction, no dice.

**RPOV**

_What is it exactly that bad boys have that attract women?_

They're rude, they're not exactly the type of guy that a person would want to introduce to their parents, and they're anything but romantic. _So __what __is __it?_

Maybe their rugged looks and beat-up leather jackets made up for their lack of chivalry.

But I digress.

I watched as a girl with flaming red hair hopped onto a man's motorcycle. The girl was wearing a mini leather studded jacket that did nothing to cover her midriff and tight skinny jeans. She seemed to be only fifteen or sixteen years old while the man easily could've been thirty. Shaking my head in disgust, I looked back at the rough draft of my essay.

The essay itself seemed fine. However, being the overachieving student that I was, it seemed to be missing...spark. Priding myself in my writing skills, I frowned. Of all essays I had written beforehand, I had personal experiences to compare the topics to; this seemed far out of my comfort zone.

I've never dated before.

You'd think that with my grades and exceptional skills in extra-curricular activities, guys would be all over me. But it seems that that is not the case. Kind of like how girls like bad boys, guys like "hot" girls. And I am by no means "hot." Perhaps I can settle for average, but it seems boys at my school disagree. Although I'm aware of my lack of beauty, I am by no means a troll. But, I digress yet again.

"Strawberry frap with extra whipped cream?"

I looked up from my paper to find myself staring at the face of a teenage boy. He seemed around my age or perhaps a bit older.

"Uhh...Yes that's mine. You can place it over here," I stuttered, quickly making room on the cluttered table.

Opposite gender. Talking. To. Me. Breathe. In and out. Chill. OH EM GEE. OHEMGEE. Not just any boy. Hot boy. Hot boy!

"I said you can leave it there. I believe you should quit dawdling and get back to work," I snapped.

"Okay, okay. Chill," the boy replied, putting his hands up.

God. I did it again. I should apologize. It wasn't his fault I was terrified of even looking at...men.

"Are you leaving or what?" I sneered, tapping my foot as he set down the drink onto the only unoccupied area of the desk.

The boy looked me in the eye and as my gaze faltered, he smirked. He smirked! At me!

"Listen, I know I'm sexy," he drawled out, "but I don't fuck nerds."

I gawked at him. I didn't know whether I should've been offended or turned on. I went with the safer choice.

"And I don't do jerks. Good luck finding a girl who would want to be with you, let alone marry you," I smirked. Ha. Take that. Guys _always_ get offended by that.

Cringe.

"I don't seem to have any problems getting a fucking girl, or a guy if you're into that shit, but let's just say I don't have any plans to get whipped anytime soon."

Cringe, cringe, cringe.

I was speechless. Having no mind filter, in a desperate attempt to salvage the situation, I uttered possibly the stupidest, most idiotic phrase I had ever spoken in my entire life.

"Wham bam thank you m'am?"

He raised an eyebrow at me and attempted to stifle his laughter.

"Wham bam thank you what?" he asked before he burst out in laughter.

"Wham bam thank you m'am. Maybe if you payed attention more, you'd be able to actually notice that it was a question. So do you or what?" I huffed, crossing my arms across my chest.

"Do what?" he asked, a sincere expression of confusion displaying on his face.

"You know...stuff..." I whispered, too embarrassed to speak any louder.

"You mean fuck?"

Cringe. Cough. Ahem.

"I believe that ermm...sex...is a much more appropriate term," I replied. Hey, I can write about it perfectly fine...I just...Okay, I'm a prude.

"Seriously? You can't even say a bad word? Can you even say crap?" he asked, looking at me with an undecipherable emotion-but he probably was just trying too hard not to double over in laughter. Psh. When you're working at Microsoft, I'm owning it boy.

"Crap is fine...That's not even a cuss word, it is simply a word that is misused by people as a vulgar slang word simply because it sounds like a bad word," I explained indignantly.

"You're a prude." Yes I am.

"I am definitely not! Teenagers of these days are simply far too spontaneous making normal teens seem to be...of less spontaneity." No, I'm just a prude. "Besides, shouldn't you be working right now? I doubt your _boss_ would appreciate it if you keep loitering around." Me, one. Mr. I Sleep Around, ZERO.

"I'm sure my boss would be completely fine with it, seeing that my _mother_ owns this place," he smiled, obviously smug by my newfound revelation.

...Insert cuss word here because Rin is far too much of a prude to even think it.

Don't freak out, don't freak out. Subject has claimed his mother has ownership of the cafe. No proof has been shown as of yet. No solid evidence. No witnesses.

"You don't fucking believe me do you?" he stated, interrupting my thought process.

"...No?" And honestly, I didn't know. He seemed sincere, but so far his personality pointed to one thing...he was probably a "bad boy." I'm pretty sure bad boys lie, hence the bad.

I didn't really understand why Mr. I Bang Everyone continued to talk to me. Most people deemed me antisocial the moment I let something fly out of my mouth. Talking to someone...it kind of felt nice.

I was quickly pulled out of my thoughts as a harsh wind whipped through my hair and high heels clicked on the floor.

"Lennieeee!" sang a girl...I think.

High heels, high heels. Red dress, RED DRESS. Burnin' Up played in my head as the "girl" clung onto...Lennie? Pfft.

Sure "she" had on high heels and a red dress, but...I'm sorry I don't believe that is a girl. I believe that THING is a troll, not me. I don't know much about makeup, but I'm pretty sure you don't dunk your face into foundation and let three-year-olds draw on your face.

"...Mimori..." replied "Lennie" as he attempted to unwrap Mimori's arms from his waist.

Mimori didn't budge and only gripped him tighter.

"Oh, Len! Ever since that night, I've been only thinking about you! We can get married, raise kids, and sell this hellhole of a cafe!" shrieked Mimori.

"Hello? Third party here? I'm pretty sure P.D.A counts as a public disturbance."

Mimori turned her head to stare at me.

"Len? Who is this? Are you cheating on me? Tell me it's a lie! Tell me!" she yelled, punching "Len" or "Lennie." I suppose she was attempting to be...cute, but she was anything but.

"Her? She's just someone I met today. She's also probably the last person I'd ever cheat on you with," he replied, smirking at me. God, that smirk...

"Hey!" I shouted, as people turned their heads towards me. Sure, okay. I yell once, everyone looks. That Mimori girl shouts the entire time, nobody cares?

"_If_ I was dating you, of course."

Mimori looked as if someone had slapped her in the face. Fifteen times. Perhaps a hundred.

"Well, I'd hate to leave you here...all alone...but it's that time of the year!" he shouted as he ran in record time to the kitchen of the cafe.

Mimori stood frozen in place. I couldn't help but laugh. She looked like one of those idiot girls from an anime...

Len or Lennie, I still didn't know which, seemed pretty funny...and nice, considering he was the first to actually hold a conversation with me. But he was still a bad boy and Mimori was proof of that.

Bad boys were...bad. However, it was completely necessary for me to get that personal experience to write convincingly.

Maybe I would be able to get that spark into my essay.

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><p>If there was one word to describe Shin, it would be crazy.<p>

Shin is the only guy that I know and will ever know that has the guts to dye his hair pink. Not just any pink. Bright, neon pink. To top it off, his personality completely screams "send me to an asylum and put me in a straitjacket!"

But he's also my best friend...

Okay, my only friend.

"Bitch! Where you've been at!"

Excuse me?

I turned around ready to murder when I spotted a fluff of pink hair...with blue highlights?

"Shin, I told you to watch your language. You know that I...don't appreciate it when you use profanities," I sighed, shaking my head.

"Huh. The day I stop swearing is the day my dad knocks himself dead and keels over. So it ain't happ'n anytime soon, girl."

Confused? You should be.

It's been a running gag for Shin and I. Although to some it would seem morbid and cruel, we joked about Shin's dad dying. Perhaps the reason why we joked about it was because the old man never seemed to age.

So I'm not a total angel. Sue me.

"You're glowing."

Huh?

"You've totally met someone! You little piece of shit! I want details. Now!" yelled Shin, feigning anger. Psh. Sorry but someone angry does not want details. Not that there are.

"Shin, you know that I'm the last person to ever have a relationship with anyone. Besides, I'm pretty sure that the story behind your blue highlights would be much more interesting than my nonexistent story."

Shin dyed his hair for every bad break-up.

"Naw, girl. Same thing, same thing. Some lil' bitch thought he'd cheat on me. Sorry, but you can't out-whore the whore!" replied Shin whilst waving his hand beside my face.

I resisted the urge to slap his hand.

"Now, you have some explaining to do. I know a glow when I see one. You have it either when you meet someone new or..."

Shin gasped.

"You didn't bang someone, did ya!"

What? No, no, no, no, no. Hell, why was I think this!

"NO!" I screamed.

Too bad nobody was here to see my face now.

"So you met someone new?" asked Shin, quirking an eyebrow.

"No!"

"You're in denial."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Don't be a smart arse."

"You mean ass?"

Ugh.

"He's a juvenile delinquent anyways," I whispered. Really, there was no way winning with Shin. I'll admit Len had piqued my interest, but I could not picture myself in a relationship with him.

"A bad boy? Girl, if you already have the physical attraction then I don't see how it would be a problem for you to snag him up...But if you don't want him..."

"NO!"

I never said I wasn't attracted to him. I simply said that I couldn't see myself "being with" him.

"If you want him so badly I can help you. Though it's a waste," Shin sighed, curling his peculiar hair with his finger.

Well, I did need a "personal experience."

Grades or boys? Grades or boys?

"Okay."

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><p><strong>And that's a wrap for the first chapter!<strong>

**As soon as I get enough reviews to start a Q&A or a FAQ, I'll post it here... Also, PM me if you know/write good stories! Lately, I've been far too lazy to lurk around fanfic although I'm in a desperate need for some fics! Any category is fine...Just not any cartoon fics. If I like them, I'll try to recommend them if this story does well.**

**Furthermore, I'd like to apologize once again for any errors in the grammar/plot development. This series is something that I intend to go through with, but I'm fresh from a hiatus and my skills are a bit rusty.**

**Flames are welcomed. I laugh. After all, I'm glad haters actually took the time to write a review for my story. One review for me, one laugh for me, haters you get...you don't really get anything :P**

**On that note...**

**With much love,**

**Jullieanne**


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